Unfortunately most discipline techniques are based on what NOT to do, and not on training the child WHAT to do.
- Explain rules clearly – repeat periodically, when there is no issue.
- Do brainstorming “what is discipline” and then “why is discipline needed”
- Take child’s opinion in framing rules, explain certain rules cannot be changed (and why)
- Explain what punishment is given, why, how (including for repeated offences)
- Punishment to be given without delay, but be patient, bring down your temper
- Describe the action of the child, and how it broke the rules. Listen to his side of the story
- Bring in the human element – your emotions – “I felt sad when you …..”
- Do not pull down self-esteem of the child. Punish the act, not the child
- Ask yourself truthfully whether the punishment is necessary. Be a role model
- Think of constructive punishment. No corpora punishment under any circumstance
- Consistency: g. the word “shit” is not allowed. If it is allowed/not allowed on different occasions, it confuses the child and gives the impression “It is me who is bad”.
- Immediately after punishing, show friendliness and concern for the child
- Develop assertiveness – calm and forceful personality
- Keep identifying and appreciating good qualities of child. Punish the act, not the child
- Keep an eye out for those who disrupt, and engage their minds otherwise.
- Aim for “inner transformation” rather than “forced compliance” It works !
