Alcohol passes through stomach lining (then through small intestine) into bloodstream, then to brain. It depresses the central nervous system within a few minutes, depending on speed of drinking, the dilution, whether food has been eaten etc.
People react differently to alcohol: Feel High, sad or depressed, they develop error of judgment, slow reactions. Some become violent, other forgetful, and some have hangovers.Everyone has a different “limit” in drinking.
Then……Why do people drink?
“Makes me feel good, relaxed” “I am at ease with people”, “To get away from problems”, “Everyone else does”. “Makes me feel attractive, smarter, and stronger.” These are all temporary boosts that extract a great price. Withdrawal symptoms can make a person dysfunctional. The whole family suffers when one person becomes addicted. If your parents drink….. You are more prone towards addiction. The dividing line between social drinking vs. problem drinking is very thin.
Harmful effects of Alcohol: Liver, stomach, brain, heart, pregnancy.
40% of all serious accidents in USA every day, have an alcohol connection. In India also the number is very high.
How to Avoid
Ask yourself why do your friends force you to drink? What is their motive? Say: “No thanks, it makes me sick” “My mother is waiting for me”, “I have a sports match tomorrow”, and be firm. If forced on you, take only one sip, and quietly throw it away Get more involved in sports, yoga, talking it out, spirituality, whatever suits you
Counselling Potential Addicts
Forced treatment does not work. Motivation on the part of the client is important. Motivation varies from time to time. Understand this and accept it.
- Establish a good rapport
- Show unconditional acceptance
- Make him realize you are interested in his welfare.
- Identify problems caused by his addiction
- Work out alternate styles of coping with problems
- Alternate behavior patterns at usual drinking time.
- Avoid places where he usually drinks.
- Avoid drinking peers
- Give free choice, give information of alternative means to give up
Follow Up:
Counsel family to support client during the withdrawal phase, and to avoid criticism. Give unconditional support and listening to family FAMILY MEMBERS should understand Three C’s which are not in their control: Cause Cure Control
COMMUNICATING (Adult with Teenager)
- Use her language & terminology – allow her to use slang/criticism
- Use e-mail, SMS, Whats App
- Listen more than speak
- Tolerate her wide mood swings from adult to child – don’t react
- Allow her silences on vital issues (but express your disappointment)
- Encourage her to talk about her friends (be non-judgmental)
- Be consistent in exercising your authority
- Be a role model in day to day activities
- Show interest in activities that she likes
- Give her space
- Offer to help her, but allow her freedom to choose
- Send her unexpected messages/gifts (and don’t expect response)
- Share family worries, but reassure that you can handle it
- Praise specific acts of hers (note, card, gift, public acknowledgement)
- Bring up topic of concern, be non-judgmental, and ask for her views
- Talk to her about boys, sex, values, morals & take her opinion
- Don’t react to her anger outbursts or use of bad language, ignore and move on
- Discuss role models and what is happening in her world – without passing judgment
- Whenever possible, give her praise, positive strokes for smallest deeds (not grades) Communication is the most important factor of how she is going to behave with her elders.
I Am…………………….
We have a social Self (the image we present ourselves in society), a personal Self (how we are to ourselves and our closest confidantes) and a secret Self – some very personal experiences or attitudes which we just cannot share with anyone else. This is common to all of us to greater or lesser extent and generally should not cause any serious issues.
However, if there is a wide gap between these three, then we need to introspect whether we are living an artificial or hypocritical life. There will be some discomfort trying to balance the three aspects and shuttling from one to other. Without our realizing, it can take a toll on us in the long run.
I have been noticing that with the advent of technology and social media, many of us now have an e-Selfwhich is what we project to others through Facebook, Linked-in, Instagram, Tinder etc. Hiding behind the protection of the smart-phone we build an image that is just not real.The consequences of such adventurism can eventually be very emotionally traumatic……
